Catticus wrote: ↑4 years ago
Hi, My Gypsy Gal
I'm not doing that good. Not HORRIBLE, just...I don't know. I have been having horrible nightmares and I need my blood pressure meds and my other med, but I just CANNOT go to that awful clinic. I need to call them but I'm feeling icky off my medication, so can't even manage to make a darn phone call. It's because I don't want to hear "NO."
My mother's appointment for the pump replacement is next week. Dr. Ar.... something. Or As....? I look at his card and forget his name EVERY SINGLE TIME. It's because it's not a name I can even pronounce!
Still, at least he's a neuro-spine specialist. My sis works closely with different people alllllll day, allll week, and is scared to come here to be here for the procedure in case she has that STINKY virus and just doesn't know it yet. She's afraid she'd give it to our parents or me. I don't think my immune system is very strong. I remember at a job I had here I stood next to an architect-engineer as he handed me a notebook he had been writing on for me to type up.
He did not cough on me. Or sneeze. I only touched the notebook once because I didn't need to leaf through it.
That night in bed, my back started hurting in odd places, then my joints. I finally thought "This isn't normal pain. I don't feeeeel gooooood. Then it hit me and I made it to the bathroom where I was throwing up in the trash can while *ahem* sitting on the pot. That kind of sick.
I went back to bed and ended having to get up so many times, I finally put a towel down on the bathroom floor and just stayed in there, on the floor! I didn't know until that morning that my dad was having the same problem all night.
I got a Z Pack from the doctor I had then. Finished the 7 day course of pills, and felt better. Then it struck again! My dad got it twice too.
I mentioned it to a dentist I was going to at that time and she said "Ohhh...that's been going around. And each of us got it, then got it again after getting better!"
That architect-engineer had his own office and was in it the whole time he was there that day which was about half a day because he said he felt so sick, he had to go home.
I only stood by him for a few seconds and he was there a few hours in his office. I touched his notebook once, to set it on my desk. I was ill that night.
I don't know if my immune system is low or not but that's what some have told me. Nobody else there got it.
I don't dare go into that awful clinic. But I am feeling worse because I have been having to stretch out my medication, and it's just not cutting it.
I took the big trash cans out at 9pm because I am not fit to be seen.
Please, pray everyone? That I can get my butt moving to call that dang clinic. It means a trip to W, but the pharmacy is empty whenever I go. No lines, no wait. And I don't have to sit on a gross chair that someone just vacated.
This virus surely lives its ten days on CLOTHING and HAIR, not just "surfaces" such as counters, door handles, etc. So shouldn't we be washing the clothes we wore as soon as we get home? Or is it too late? Sigh.
There is a discontinuation syndrome with the medication I am on. Anyone taking these are not supposed to just stop abruptly. But it's not like this is a normal doctor's office, either. I don't want to bring anything home to my parents! Especially with my mom finally rescheduled for next week!
This new doctor said my mom's pain pump expired in January! My dad looked it up in her paperwork and found it said March. So she's running on the backup battery right now.
She had her pre-op so is scheduled next week. I don't know if her Cardio is going to want her to stay overnight AT THIS SNAKE VIRUS HOSPITAL or not, for observation because of her heart stents. I'm terrified because anesthesia does some freaky things. My dad had an outpatient procedure a couple years ago that required anesthesia. A twilight type sleep. He was fine afterwards and then once we got alllllmost home, he coughed and slumped over! We had to call 911 and they couldn't revive him. He was out like a light. So back to the hospital he was sent! He woke up and said "HUH? What am I here for? We left for home!" They checked him out and found nothing wrong so re-released him. His doctor said anesthesia can do strange things sometimes.
I GUESSSSS SOOOOOO!
Anyway, my dad doesn't usually say things like this but he said he felt that her usual pain doctor "really dropped the ball this time." Because they kept forgetting to return our calls, didn't set it up when they were supposed to, they then waited too long and then canceled and she had to go through the hoops of visits AGAIN. They did this twice! But the third time she had to cancel.
She has stents in her heart. She and my dad turn 95 soon. Anesthesia? She could die from going under an anesthetic.
I'm so upset. And worse because I don't have my medication.
I hate this whole thing!
I AM TERRIFIED. I'm not afraid of getting the virus and dying unless I'm the only one who gets it and it leaves my sis alone. She said the same thing. If I got it she's coming up because no wayyyyyyy. If she gets it, I'll WALK there if I have to because no wayyyyyy. I can't even type the words. It's just a "twin thing." I cannot explain it any better.
We have no hand sanitizer, I have 1/4 of a bottle of alcohol. My mom might have a full one.
I was thinking of making a mix of bleach and liquid lotion!
Other than that, my mom stays home, my dad does pretty much, and now moreso because it hurts his left foot so badly to walk. He got a Cortisone shot a few weeks ago. I wrote about it on here. It feels like that was months and months ago. I don't even remember! My mom and I never know what day it is anymore. She doesn't because of the heart attacks and her medications causing short term memory loss. BAD short term memory loss! She can now sit in her chair and fiddle with her coupon pages from the mail and newspaper, and not realize three hours has passed. MY not knowing the day is because of stress.
So Thursday the 19th we head to the hospital where COVID-19 is. My sister and I just say to each other that we've, including our parents, likely been places already where COVID-19 was. So we cannot worry. Also, if our parents DID get it and die from it, maybe it would have been worse had they not. Because we don't want them to linger with terrible pain or whatever in the future!
That may sound callous to some, but death to us means being with The Lord. It's the fear of being the one left; alone, while the other(s) die that scares us so much!
Well boy howdy aren't I just a ray of sunshine?
I'm sorry!
Please pray the procedure isn't canceled by them, that my mom is able to make it this time AND that she handles the anesthesia well with NO LASTING AFTER EFFECTS. She's been different ever since her stent surgery.
I'm SO TIRED OF BEING SCARED!
Thank you! I love you guys! Guys? Gals. No, that sounds odd.
I love you, my dear friends!
This has errors I am sure, but I'm posting it without checking. I just don't care right now!
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